WHAT is that on my boob !!???!!!

Ok so I really shouldn't be on line blogging because I have so much to do today before 5pm its not even funny. Really, Im not laughing... for once. But yesterday/this morning was one of these classic "Rene" mornings that really is blog-worthy so I have to take the time to jot this down.

[Sidebar: In a nutshell, I have to complete all my clinical homework for class this eve (5:30pm) which is all the Patient Care Reports (PCRs) I did on both rotations. Details and more details and a summary for each. I also have to continuously study for my skills final this Thurs and next Tues, for my class final the 25th and for the National Registry Exam after that so I can be licensed to work and to apply to Paramedic School. I am also trying to find a Paramedic school that has a schedule that jives with my life. Plus I want to get a 3 hour bike ride in today before 3pm when my son has baseball. So Ive got that buzzing around my head on top of my daily stuff (taking care of dogs, kids, collecting eggs, scooping litter, etc].

Yesterday, the main water pipe in the backyard burst while I was out just to give you a sample of the goings on in my life. The chickens were pissed due to the loud squirting/spraying noise so they were running around the yard barking at me, while I stood there and thought, great... where the hell is the water shut off key". It was too funny. To shup them up I pick them up and pet them, they hate that, they get the picture pretty quick. So with muffled clucking coming from some irritated yet respectfully hushes birds, I scoop the dog poop and chicken poop on the patio. The entire time Im talking to them about why they must poop on my nice patio and not the lawn... as they follow me around like something tasty is going to magically fall out of the scooper full of their shit, nothing ever has so why they think it will is beyond me. I think this might be why they came up with the phrase bird-brain. I turn off the main water in the front of the house. I then go inside and use the kitchen faucet (because Im stupid and forgot that just 1 minute ago I had turned off the water ) and as I lift the handle it rips right off- FAB!!! No sink water either. God dammit. Not cool, I didnt wash my hands after chicken fondling. Ewwww. Make mental note to not bite nails...... so Martin spent the late afternoon fixing that, yay Martin !!! Thanks honey. He fixed it just in time for me to take a shower so I could go to my Bike Club meeting. I went for a run with the spaz dog so I was sweaty and grimey. I was in a state of "oh my god if I dont take a shower I was going to have a conniption fit" ( I dont like to be filthy). All turned out ok... Rene bathed, she made the meeting and all was right in the world.

So I wake up this morning and lay there for a while, groggily thinking "this time change is screwing with my head, I'm sooooo tired in the mornings". Im a total morning person, like high energy from the get-go, yakking and diving into the day, it drives my husband nuts. So Im laying there with the kitten doing his usual spaz attacks under the blankets and Tobys with his front end up on the bed asking for pets and I feel a pinch on my armpit/boob area and I rub it and think, holy moly Ive got some huge zit or something going on! It feels really odd so I look and Oh MY GOD its my husbands-from the night before-gooey- bandaid that he had on this hellacious cut on his palm !! GROOOOOOOSSSSS!!!! So I rip it off and fling it and of course the kitten leaps from the bed and pounces on it (before he actually registers what this flying object could be- thats cat philosophy: pounce first, figure it out later) and immediately begins a game of pick up- one- on- zero soccer game. Im up. My day has started. I go down and make my girly-coffee as Martin calls it (those International Coffees- Vanilla flavor) and socialize with the hubby before he takes off for work. I go down to the basement to do my laundry as I have no kit to ride in today and there is an inch of water over the entire floor. I assume this is from the water fiasco from the day before. Its like Im not phased- I just stand there in my socks, yes socks, because Toby ate my slippers last night as I studied- like RIGHT next to me and I didnt hear the rip/shred/tear fest.. thats how hard I was focused. And I look around and think, shit the basement is full of water.. I cant deal with this now, I have to feed the iguana and water the crickets....... Anything sitting on the floor in the basement is soaked- my socks on my feet, games, dirty laundry, comforters, blankets, camping gar, backpacks, good GOD !!!! Now I get to mop that up with towels then wash THOSE towels. It never ends....my coffee is cold, I need to go nuke it. So I come upstairs to write this down. At the expense of the flooring in my basement I hope this story at least made you smile. Or even appreciate that your life is NOT my life. LOL :)

Ok, I gotta go study.......